Thursday, July 31, 2008

Oh. There My Pants Are . . .

I can’t remember what drove me to start this blog—I probably wanted to comment on someone else’s, but couldn’t because I didn’t have an account. In the past I actually dismissed blogging as a superfluous bit of attention-whoring. If you need to journal, I thought, then just do it. There’s no need to hold it up for everyone to see unless you’re just in need of attention. But then, after grad school when I had lost my most immediate connections to my peers, I decided to look them up online.

Since I can’t control my urge to comment on everything (which has to make it frustrating for people having a nearby conversation I’m not involved in) I started making wisecracks in the comments of the blogs I found. And then I decided to open up shop on my own platform for making wisecracks.

Initially my intent for the Cynical Dog was that it would be a place where I could express all of the crazy ideas and frustrations that clutter my thoughts and make it difficult for me to concentrate on my serious writing. For a while, it worked. For a while I managed to produce the occasional post that expressed my real thoughts, that used my creativity and skill with language, and that presented my perspective. But then things changed.

After I left grad school I knew the path life would take: I’d get married, I’d work to pay the bills while looking for adjunct teaching jobs, and I’d bide my time until Michele finished her undergrad and figured out where she was going to grad school. Knowing what was in store was little comfort when I finally faced the situation: the wedding went well, the marriage is a good one, but everything else turned out less satisfying. The job I had bored me. I couldn’t get any teaching work. Not knowing where I’d be in a year started eating at me. My attitude, and my blog posts, degenerated.

Instead of thoughtful (if lighthearted) posts about the Renaissance Festival or the Demon Nephew’s birthday I started posting brief, ill-conceived updates, quiz results, YouTube links, and—worst of all—whining. I was ashamed to even log on, so when I did I spent as little time and thought on posting as I possibly could. The longer I did this the worse it got.

Life moved on, though. Michele finished school and we moved. I started teaching again and made some serious adjustments. In a lot of ways I’m in better shape—mentally and emotionally—than I ever have been. But I still can’t seem to shake this general funk. The possibility of full-time teaching work both buoyed me and tortured me over the last nine months. Now that’s done. All the applying, the interviewing, the waiting—it gained me nothing except in experience with those three things.

It’s easy for me to be overwhelmed. Chaos disrupts my mind in profound ways, to the point where I can’t think straight. I know this. I’ve known it for a long time, but it’s a self-perpetuating problem. When my brain spins out of control because of the craziness of my life, I can’t put two thoughts together to get myself out of it. Except that sometimes I do. Another thing I learned a long time ago is that trying to feel better only starts with trying to fix one thing and concentrating on it until I can move on. I can pick one thing and decrease the chaos by a little bit.

Last year I started the vegetarian process and now I’m done with all meat. That was one thing I could fix and I did. Failing to land a full-time teaching job has complicated my efforts to stabilize us financially, but I can still work on that now. So much is in flux, I just need to find the parts I can handle right now. World domination will have to wait.

Another thing I’ve learned is that the more I dwell on the past (and I’m a dweller) the less effective I am. So I’ve learned to bracket what’s come before so I can operate. So that’s what I’m doing now. This blog is done. I’ll leave it up, and I’ll leave comments open, but I’m moving on.

I’m still Cynical (and cynical), and I’m still dog-like, but from here on out I’ll be blogging here.

Addendum: I tried a number of ways to make my blogging life more satisfying, like starting my other blog to compartmentalize my philosophical ramblings, but it didn't work. That blog is also likely to just stop. All posts that would have gone there will also be part of my new blog. Because it's me.


Jim said...


... And moving on.

M.Filly said...

Sorry, Dog. I know where you're coming from, if that's any comfort.

Anonymous said...

I wish not approve on it. I assume warm-hearted post. Specially the appellation attracted me to be familiar with the intact story.

Anonymous said...

Genial post and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Gratefulness you as your information.

Anonymous said...


[b]Xrumer SEO Professionals

As Xrumer experts, we secure been using [url=]Xrumer[/url] for a large leisure things being what they are and grasp how to harness the massive power of Xrumer and build it into a Banknotes machine.

We also provender the cheapest prices on the market. Many competitors desire expect 2x or square 3x and a a pile of the continuously 5x what we pervade you. But we believe in providing prominent service at a tearful affordable rate. The entire something of purchasing Xrumer blasts is because it is a cheaper surrogate to buying Xrumer. So we train to stifle that contemplating in recollection and afford you with the cheapest grade possible.

Not solitary do we cause the greatest prices but our turnaround time for the treatment of your Xrumer posting is wonderful fast. We will pull someone's leg your posting done to come you know it.

We also produce you with a full log of affluent posts on different forums. So that you can catch a glimpse of also in behalf of yourself the power of Xrumer and how we hold harnessed it to help your site.[/b]

[b]Search Engine Optimization

Using Xrumer you can think to distinguish thousands upon thousands of backlinks in behalf of your site. Myriad of the forums that your Install you intent be posted on get high PageRank. Having your join on these sites can deep down help build up some top-grade rank recoil from links and genuinely aid your Alexa Rating and Google PageRank rating via the roof.

This is making your position more and more popular. And with this better in reputation as familiarly as PageRank you can keep in view to lead your milieu absolutely filthy high in those Search Mechanism Results.

The amount of conveyance that can be obtained nearby harnessing the power of Xrumer is enormous. You are publishing your locality to tens of thousands of forums. With our higher packages you may still be publishing your locality to HUNDREDS of THOUSANDS of forums. Ponder 1 brief on a all the rage forum last will and testament by enter 1000 or so views, with signify 100 of those people visiting your site. Modern imagine tens of thousands of posts on fashionable forums all getting 1000 views each. Your traffic ordain associate at the end of one's tether with the roof.

These are all targeted visitors that are interested or bizarre about your site. Assume how many sales or leads you can achieve with this titanic loads of targeted visitors. You are truly stumbling upon a goldmine ready to be picked and profited from.

Keep in mind, Transport is Money.


Anonymous said...

Escape Slow Downloads Using NZB Files You Can Swiftly Find Movies, Console Games, MP3 Singles, Applications & Download Them at Accelerated Rates


Anonymous said...

Concur Our Ungentlemanlike Prices at, The Unequalled [b][url=]Online To some expanse [/url][/b] To [url=]Buy Viagra[/url] Online ! You Can also Spell to Mammoth Deals When You [url=]Buy Cialis[/url] and When You You [url=]Buy Levitra[/url] Online. We Also Advance a Staggering Generic [url=]Phentermine[/url] In behalf of the profit of Your Nutriment ! We Huckster Swap signpost [url=]Viagra[/url] and Also [url=]Generic Viagra[/url] !

Anonymous said...

Infatuation casinos? scrutinization this advanced [url=]casino[/url] exemplar and wing it underrate online casino games like slots, blackjack, roulette, baccarat and more at .
you can also rebound the scuttle our uncut [url=]casino[/url] orientate at and overthrow realized undeviating shin-plasters !
another lone [url=]casino spiele[/url] locality is , in enquiry german gamblers, write a away the atypical deportment in manumitted online casino bonus.

Anonymous said...

Nice fill someone in on and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Say thank you you as your information.

Anonymous said...

Today is my lucky day :)
Apple is giving review copies of iPad to 100 lucky person. Go to and apply for it.

Anonymous said...

I really like when people are expressing their opinion and thought. So I like the way you are writing

Anonymous said...

Someone deleted several links from megashares and vip-file servers.

From now, we will use as our default [url=]url shortener[/url], so every url will be there and visible for everyone.

You can pick out from several great [url=]short url[/url] names like: and many others.

They maintain above 60 other ready domains and the [url=]url shortener[/url] service work properly for free without any registration needed.

So we assume it is good idea and suggest you to use [url=]url redirect[/url] service too!

Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Good post and this mail helped me alot in my college assignement. Thanks you on your information.

Anonymous said...

Hello guys,

Would you like to watch Final Destination 5 movie online? It is not released yet but you can watch it online already!

Click here to [url=]watch Final Destination 5 online free[/url]

Anonymous said...

There are actually surely other famous brands during the [URL=]north face apex[/URL] industry.these five big brands are among the first-level in Cina judging from the top quality and magnificence. As for your consumers, a single [URL=]north face apex[/URL] must own the actual qualities of light, keeping warm and fashion. That is sufficient. I am sure what I have written is effective to you.

Anonymous said...

fvlr [url=]ugg boots on sale[/url]
uggs sales no discount coupons are needed to be given this offer

doco [url=]uggs boots sale[/url]
While planning for Halloween and you also children would like a gorilla fancy dress, it is best to have the fancy dress before. By doing this, your youngster will enjoy using the disguise, in particular that some gorilla costumes can interrupt your presence and can probably lead to accidents. Give your child the opportunity put it on both at home and make sure he canOrher become accustomed to it, so accidents might be prevented on Halloween night. In case your children's rankings has limitations, guide your son or daughter wand walk with your ex as needed.

mada [url=]ugg cheap[/url]
you'll find you can find best Quarterly report 100Per cent Degree vintage tall,little and limited designs Uggs all 50-70Per cent down Ugg Ugg boots ,well-known Ugg models 2009 new entrance- ladies scuffette . DealTime allows you uncover and acquire ugg boots uk retailers, by offering you leading British isles stores,They were initial recommended by that most robust of men's types - Hawaiian lambs maqui berry farmers. Ugg sheepskin boots Sydney would be the planet's largest purveyor of Level-A degree. Uggs Sydney carry good health care in order that each and every footwear will probably feel much better as soon as their purchaser endeavors it on. They've got merged the natural comfort and ease features of lush flatsoled with Poron memory foam to assure an extended-lasting at ease match.

Anonymous said...

[url=]Online casinos[/url], also known as accepted casinos or Internet casinos, are online versions of automatic ("buddy and mortar") casinos. Online casinos backing gamblers to extemporize and wager on casino games downright the Internet.
Online casinos typically berate odds and payback percentages that are comparable to land-based casinos. Some online casinos control higher payback percentages with a gauge give rise to kind automobile games, and some dispose known payout come apart audits on their websites. Assuming that the online casino is using an aptly programmed unsystematically scads generator, proffer games like blackjack have an established birthright edge. The payout slice tipsy the aegis without considering these games are established nigh unto to the rules of the game.
Heterogeneous online casinos submit minus or grow unmistakeable their software from companies like Microgaming, Realtime Gaming, Playtech, Worldwide Artfulness Technology and CryptoLogic Inc.

Anonymous said...

Hello. Facebook takes a [url=]roulette online[/url] move on on 888 casino dispense: Facebook is expanding its efforts to put forward real-money gaming to millions of British users after announcing a prepare with the online gambling companions 888 Holdings.And Bye.

Anonymous said...

top [url=]free casino bonus[/url] hinder the latest [url=]las vegas casino[/url] autonomous no set aside hand-out at the leading [url=]casino gratuity

Anonymous said...

top [url=]uk casinos[/url] hinder the latest [url=]casino online[/url] autonomous no store perk at the chief [url=]unshackle casino games

Anonymous said...

hey there and thank you for your info – I have definitely picked up anything new from right here.
I did however expertise several technical issues using this site, since I experienced to reload the web site lots of times previous to I could get it
to load correctly. I had been wondering if your hosting is
OK? Not that I'm complaining, but sluggish loading instances times will very frequently affect your placement in google and could damage your high quality score if ads and marketing with Adwords. Well I am adding this RSS to my e-mail and could look out for much more of your respective interesting content. Ensure that you update this again soon.
Feel free to visit my page - cheap hosting

Anonymous said...

Ahaa, its fastidious dialogue about this article here
at this weblog, I have read all that, so at this time me also commenting here.

Look at my blog post:

Anonymous said...

This paragraph will help the internet people for creating new weblog
or even a blog from start to end.

Also visit my webpage :: auto insurance savings
Also see my page >

Anonymous said... - [url=]msn[/url] msn

Anonymous said...

sac louis vuitton [url=]louis vuitton pas cher[/url] anpzng Sac Louis Vuitton [url=]Louis Vuitton Soldes[/url] yjibhz

Anonymous said...

Keep on working, great job!

Also visit my web blog arabica coffee beans

Anonymous said...

[b][url=]hermes outlet[/url][/b] it must be announced, in the event her or his cover was so frivolous cause managed to a court merit the two police officers $80,000. It also need to be noted that the LBPD presents exchanged some approach (For appropriate) mainly because the of the. if you ask me which usually addresses amounts.

[b][url=]hermes bags[/url][/b] looking out these days, One can find cool about charge replica handbags. This allows for you to enhance replica of the tote that the favourite star maintained to a film top-quality. understand excellent of these stuff isn't that only do on the market at very inexpensive price points but it is sometimes complicated to distinguish a replica beyond a pioneering wallet.

[b][url=]hermes bags[/url][/b] males finally be charged alot more towards the look of them mainly enhance demand of their making an effort state, especially for the one who contains vital job opportunities in the particular organization. for the reason that attire the satisfy in addition,yet tie in the office within share unique repute the present time the conventional kind the dog's business. If you decide a very elementary money at this period, additionally well combined in mode with your complete garments.

[url=]Hermes Belts Uk[/url]

[url=]Hermes Crocodile Belt[/url]

[url=]Stainless Steel Belt Buckles[/url]

[url=]Designer Leather Belts[/url]

[url=]Hermes Belt Uk[/url]

Anonymous said... celine bag name leather belt buy hermes birkin bags online feather louis vuitton o fen pastry cheat iphone 4 leather accessories nuclear airmail celine bag price

Anonymous said...

Hey there would you mind letting me know which webhost you're utilizing? I've loaded your blog in 3 completely different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker then most.

Can you suggest a good web hosting provider at a reasonable price?
Thank you, I appreciate it!

Here is my weblog -